Your source for Baltimore snark and other stuff, since 2008
Capitalism Can Eat A Dick! The United States is said to be “the greatest country in the world.” One of the major reasons this is said, is due to our adoption of Capitalism, where private citizens are allowed to own businesses and infrastructure with which to produce and sell goods, thereby making shitloads of […]
So I (and more than likely you too) hear a few days ago that Paula Deen, The Food Network star whose claim to fame is pretty much every dish having a very strong possibility of giving you a heart attack, was diagnosed with Type II Diabetes. This should come as no shock to anyone, judging […]
Primer: Angry Mike, a former Pigtown resident, purchased a “rehabbed” house from a man who, as it turns out, is something of a slumlord and didn’t exactly perform a wonderful job fixing the house. It was riddled with termites unbeknownst to the resident, among other things. A lawsuit ensued (see what I did there) and […]
 |
Repo Men: A pretty formulaic “Big Brother Future” action movie. Well, to be fair, pretty much all of the action is at the end of the flick. Basically, people are getting more and more unhealthy and a company called “The Union” has perfected cybernetic organs! Huzzah! unfortunately, they are completely unaffordable and the Union is all too eager to get you on a payment plan. Which, if you are delinquent, they call in the aforementioned Repo Men to snatch your snazzy robot liver right out, killing you dead. Essentially, these people are gov’t sponsored serial killers (aside from Jude Law, they all look like bikers and thugs).
They are legally obligated to get you an ambulance on stand by if requested, but it’s hard to ask for one when you are tazed into unconsciousness beforehand. I’m sure the director/writer was going for some deeper meaning by drawing parallels between the Union and carnivorous banks that talk you into something you can’t afford, and ruin your life when things don’t go according to plan. It’s pretty heavy handed. So Jude Law has an accident and needs a cyberorgan himself, which leads him to a change of heart, which leads to him not making any money, which leads to him being on the run and seeing all the misery and pain The Union causes. I will say, that i did not expect the ending at all, and it was kind of neat. I don’t want to ruin it though. Anyways I’d say it’s worth a rent. I didn’t want my 90 minutes back, so there’s that. Plus a guy gets killed by a typewriter. |
[…more!]
You don’t have time to read hoity-toity reviews by people with degrees in journalism or English, or use proper grammar or hardly make any sense at all, do you? Of course not! Which is why you should read these ADD reviews by Angry Mike, who has a penchant for watching movies (because he lives in […]
Guess what folks, Angry Mike is still pretty angry and apparently his ire has been piqued by the discount travel service Orbitz. Quake with fear, Orbitz, Angry Mike is gunning for YOU!! A Love Letter to Orbitz By “Love” I mean: “Go Fuck Yourself”