With all this talk about Google possibly coming to town and laying down a fiber optic network the likes of which the world hath never seen, I would make it a point to note that in doing so, Google would be making an enormous humanitarian leap in releasing the city of Baltimore from the grips of Comcast, one of the only area providers of high speed internet. It is with this thought in mind that I anxiously present to you Angry Mike, a displeased (former) Comcast customer and former housemate of mine. Feel his pain, point and laugh. Take it away, Angry Mike!
Yet another glowing endorsement of a corporate entity
I know, i know, saying COMCAST SUCKS is like saying the sky is blue or shit stinks. But seriously, they suck. Like, at EVERYTHING.
I signed up for their service long ago at my new house, and brought the equipment from my old house over. They apparently lost one of the HD converter codes in the move, as it would no longer work. A technician came out, called in the number, fixed some connections, and all was right in the world. Then my rates went up, not a few bucks oh no no – but by around $50. Well fuck you very much!
So i called and got a reduction, by invoking the unholy trinity of Verizon/VerizonHighSpeed/DirecTv. They quickly caved and got my bill back down to a respectable $140/month (still retarded). However, this entire time, my DVR’s often shit the bed, recording nothing, not responding to the remote, recording half a show, etc. When i requested some replacement DVR’s, I was very politely informed that they don’t have any… Seriously? WTF?
Well, ok, credit me my rental fees ($25!!) until you get new ones Dickface! Once again, they bowed to my superior logic and debate skills. After months of waiting for new DVRs, and hours of frustration, I decided to say FUCK IT and get a TiVo unit. Between the subscription fee, and the rental of a goddamn cable card, I wouldn’t be saving any money, but at least I’d be paying someone OTHER than Comcast.
…Or so i thought! First, they don’t have any cable cards, a fact which the technician was kind enough to inform me of after I had been waiting for him for 2 hours. Well shit, when will you have more? He had no idea. Neither did the local office, or the national 1-800 #. The only people who would know are in the warehouse, and apparently NOBODY can find them. It is at this point I am convinced I’m being Punk’d© and start actively searching for Ashton Kutcher’s face so I can punch it. Then I realize, “esus Christ Mike, that show and your joke are like 10 years old, get with the times.” “Fuck you Brain!” I say, and run off to kick the nearest guy in skinny jeans in the throat.
Fortunately for him, I get a call from Comcast saying my card is in stock and there will be someone out to install it directly. HOORAY. I bet you can guess what happens next! NOTHING. They can’t get it working, and in the process manage to break my other receiver! GG COMCAST!! So i’ve had enough. I’m so close to having a stroke I can see dead relatives. I cancel my service and immediately get Verizon/DirecTv. I take my equipment back to the Comcast office in the extremely convenient location of Pimlico (WHO THE HELL IS THAT CLOSE TO?) and check with the woman. So I’m good here, no more bills, no nothing, right? Yep, she replies.
Apparently in Comcast-ese, “Yep” means, bend over and shove your head up your ass because you are about to be in a world of shit. I am now currently on the phone for the second time, on hold for 35 minutes and counting. The gentleman who took my call first uselessly claimed “boy I hope you kept your receipt” (which I did, I simply need to remember where I put it). Apparently, nobody bothered to record my cancellation and stop billing me. However, they did manage to credit my account for canceling my HD Package. WHICH MAKES TOTAL SENSE.
So in closing, I blame Comcast for any and all crime in Baltimore City. After dealing with them, I really want to go shoot, stab, beat someone to death. Thank you very little.
PS 45 minutes and counting.
Hey, at least you are able to change providers, Angry Mike. The rest of us just have to keep getting kicked in the ass every damn day.
That’s not Fios i switched to, it’s DSL. City folk can get it. it’s honestly not that bad. It took some work to get it going though. I am far happier a person for now.
hmm. I will look into it.
Also, is that- an over-sized hat? It’s funny.
It’s funny because it’s bigger than, you know, a normal hat.
Hey – hey check out the podium look at this
I’ve gone from Prestige to Adelphia to Comcast without ever changing providors. However, Adelphia sucked WAY more than Comcast.
We did switch to Comcast HD a few weeks ago and they told us they didn’t have any HDMI compatible HD boxes. How do you not have any HDMI compatible HD boxes? HDMI is the standard, is it not?
I prefer Cavtel DSL.
Eludius, I feel your pain about the HDMI. My brand new HDTV is hooked up via component, which pisses me off to say the least.
Plus, when the technician came to install everything, I had to help him do his job he was so incompetent. Apparently hooking up a cable box is a skill set that Comcast techs don’t possess.
As a former tech for a sub contractor for comcast, i feel your pain. We were rushed into doing 5-14 stops a day, 6 days a week. One avg our day would start @ 7am and end @10pm. Our dispatch would schedule too many stops in 1 time frame, exammple 3 stops 8am – 10am, 2 @10am – 12, 3 @12pm – 2pm, 2 @2pm – 4pm, 2 @4pm – 6pm. One delay and you’re behind, two and your day is screwed. Dont forget bad boxes, cards, routers, a mis typed character. If the tech doesnt use his meter he’s screwed. One thing i did notice while working with the meter, Balt City’ signal changed for the worst so that people have to get a converter box. Balt City’ wires are one of the worst too due to alleys and lack pride in doing a good job when installing line to houses. Running cable is like installing pipes where you dont want any leaks, especially at your fittings. So a good tech should check his meter for leaks and visually look at ALL fitting and replace if needed. Time consuming. As subs we got paid per COMPLETED JOB! One pay period i worked 187 hrs and my check was under a grand!!! By Fed law i had to be paid min wage cause piece work was lower. Most subs do the installs then if anything goes wrong after the subs supervisor checks it then the Comcast Van will show and mite bill you for service call because of the previous visits. Again i wish i had serviced you, you would have had good install.
Ugh wow that sounds like hell.
I’ve also heard from another contractor that Comcast prioritizes their equipment distribution so that the ‘burbs get the best cable boxes and the city gets the crappy ones. He said they gave him 10 cable boxes that day, and 8 were busted. If Comcast isn’t a case study against monopolies, I don’t know what is.
Hey i know some french: You’re an assbite
in the past i have sent emails to the mayor’s office, and that got shit done quick. it was crazy. i sent an email and literally 2 hours later i got a call from comcast. maybe we should start flooding the mayor with more complaints to bust this monopoly.
Hahahaha I remember that! Dude do you still have that email?