Dear SpaceManAndy,
Do you have a surefire way of getting rid of a stalker? My stalker is still calling me and saying that we should be together. I’ve told him everything can to get him to leave me alone, but he just won’t listen. He calls me every night, sends me texts throughout the day. Even after I told him that we would never be together. He actually wanted to move to MD. I shot that down. He’s just being super persistent
Sincerely,
Watched from afar
Dear Watched,
I’m not sure I buy that you’ve told him everything you can. Have you told him you have recently contracted an incurable and/or highly contagious STD? Or that you’ve lost all your teeth (which could actually backfire, actually)? Horrible disfiguring car accident? See if he still loves you after that shit. Tell him you moved somewhere else! He loves you enough to move to Baltimore, does he love you enough to move to some bumblefuck small town in West Virginia? Or you could go with something more believable – like you’ve moved on and you have a new boyfriend who gets jealous. Or maybe that you got fat.
But seriously though, why are you telling him anything at all? You’ve already said you won’t be together. Why are you responding? Ignore him. He’ll get bored eventually. His constant chatter may pick up a little bit in the form of “OMG, Why aren’t you responding?!?!” but as tempting as it is to give him some slight comfort, don’t. He will eventually wind down, then you’ll only hear from him when he is drunk, then not at all. YOU HAVE TO BE STRONG! But all of this will fall apart if YOU get drunk and text HIM.You need to monitor the signals you’re sending him, in the event that you continue communication. We’re all human. It’s natural to like flattery, but you need to ask yourself if you really, honestly, and truly want him gone.
If you search your soul and decide that you really really want him to be out of your life for good, take action. If you are a customer of AT&T wireless, you can make use of a premium service called “Parental Controls” which will allow you to limit who can call you or text you by blocking or allowing certain numbers. It costs just $4.99 per month. And there’s always changing your number. It’s drastic, but you claim to be desperate.
Just be strong. Remember, this is kind of obsession isn’t cute or flattering. Do you think Condoleezza Rice was flattered when she found out Gaddafi had all those pictures of her?
I don’t know, I guess that could work. maybe?
That reminds me, I haven’t made my daily call to Val.
Well don’t procrastinate.
Obligatory Dutch woman calling her ex 65,000 times link: http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2011/09/08/earlyshow/main20103289.shtml
You appear to have left out Facebook, the best tool for stalking.
But it’s easy to block someone on FB. Go to privacy settings, then down to “Block list”
I suggest trying to resolve this amicably and politely by clearly setting your boundaries. Andy’s right that you need to be clear with your intent. Don’t chit chat with this person by responding to his random texts, or answering his phone calls. Just level with him and say that you are not interested and ask that he stop contacting you. If he resists, then there’s no shame in lying by telling him you’re involved with someone as Andy suggests. Just make sure to make your relationship status private on any social networks so he cant easily confirm you’re full of shit. After that, don’t ever reply to this man again or you will undo any progress.
Obviously if this is just some guy with persistent puppy love then there’s no need to go to extremes. If she feels this is serious enough though, and feels that she may be in
danger, she should look into getting a restraining order. They aren’t just used for keeping people at certain distances, but also in preventing any form of communication. Nothing says
fuck off like an officiated court document.
Agreed. An amicable solution with no trickery would be preferable. Let’s hope it doesn’t come to some of the more drastic things I suggest.