The Bishop’s Duck Dynasty Christmas Wish

Hello CTB Family,

It’s your friendly, neighborhood, self-appointed Bishop here.  Today I would like to bring before you a Christmas wish.  I bring this wish before you because I believe you can help make it a reality.

Don’t worry.  My request is simple.  I ain’t gonna ask you to buy two truck loads of meat snacks (that’s Evan the Mayor’s wish).  I ain’t gonna ask you to elect me King-O-City-Hall-with-Supreme-Authority-to Kick-Ass-and-Take-Names (that’s the Dennis the Cynic’s wish).  Nor am I gonna ask you to laugh at my posts like you laugh at Wham Bam TY Tam’s.  (He’s a thousand times funnier than me.  There is no use denying it.  I’m growing to live with it)

My simple, special, Christmas wish is that you stop it.

“Stop what Oh Great and Powerful Bishop?” you ask.  “What is it we must stop to appease you this holiday season?”

Stop posting shit like this on the internet:

DD1

Let’s get a few things clear about this situation:

1) No one is denying this man’s right to free speech.

Let’s say Phil from Duck Dyansty did an interview with GQ and said stuff that offended the LGBT community.  Then, let’s pretend, the next day the FBI showed up at his door, punched him in the face, put him in handcuffs, and took him to jail.  THEN they nabbed all copies of the interview and burned them in the street.

If that had happened, you could say Mr. Phil’s right to free speech was being violated.

That is not what happened.

What happened was a character from a television show mouthed off to a reporter.  The business that employs the fore mentioned character read the character’s remarks, decided they didn’t want that character working for them, and then stopped paying said character.

That is all.  No one’s rights were violated.  It does not say in the constitution that already rich white dudes with lots of facial hair have the right to rake in more cash with a reality show and at the same time say whatever the hell they want to in interviews.

Not a constitutional right.

Which brings me to my next point.

2) Phil is not a persecuted martyr you should rally behind.

This man is rich.  He is flithy, stinkin’ rich.  He ain’t no Kate Plus Eight who needs this reality show to keep his giant house.  He ain’t no poor starving podcast host slaving away in his basement makin’ meat snacks just to pay his heating bill.  No.  This man is so rich, he doesn’t even need the reality T.V. show to maintain his current level of comfort.  He was rich before the cameras were put on him.  He is not suffering at all.

Also, he was not fighting back against oppression in his interview.  Phil is not Nelson Mandela.  He is not Martin Luther King Jr.  Phil was expressing an opinion about a politically charged topic.  An opinion many in our culture find offensive.  He is not freeing slaves, calling for an end to sex-trafficking, or fighting for political prisoners unjustly chained to be freed.

Also, no one should be surprised by Phil’s opinion on homosexuality either.  Why are you shocked that a Greatest Generation, white, conservative, christian, southern man who lives in Louisana and makes duck calls for a living thinks homosexuality is a sin?  WHY IS THIS EVEN NEWS!!!  This is the best example of a stereotype being proved right that I’ve ever seen.

Back on topic…

So the incredibly rich dude looses his television show because he publicly fulfilled a stereotype.   I see no martyr here.  There is no one for you to “stand behind” or “support”.

Stop it.

Stop it, stop it, stop it.

3) Both Phil and A&E should get a pat on the back for their integrity.

Finally, if you really must post about this on the interweb, than I suggest you applaud everyone’s integrity.  Integrity is a rare commodity in our world.  It is so rare, many of you may not even recognize it.  So let me break it down for you…

Integrity is three steps:

  • Know what you believe.
  • Say what you believe.
  • Face the consequences for saying what you believe.

Regardless of how you feel about Phil’s opinion, you have to applaud his integrity.  He was asked a land mine of a question in an interview.  Instead of backing down or being wishy-washy, he said what he believes knowing there would be consequences.

A&E should also be applauded too.  They heard what their employee said and they took action.  If the show leaves, it is going to cost them millions of bucks.  I think that type of conviction should be cheered.  I wish more people would stand up for what they believe in.

Put the issue aside.  This is good public discourse.  Express your beliefs.  Own the consequences for expressing them.

It’s good, that is, until someone starts whining that they shouldn’t have had consequences for expressing their opinion.  Then everything gets gross and messy.  So when you post crap about Phil being unjustly treated, you are cheapening his integrity.

And A&E  – don’t back down.  Don’t let the money you are going to lose change your convictions.  Stand firm.  The Bishop will respect you for it.

In conclusion…

I would love to see the pics of your kid’s holiday school concert.  I would be more than happy to read about how your cup of coffee tasted this morning.  Go ahead and post all day about stuff people said at work. Take a picture of your dinner and send that out to the world.  This is all fantastic stuff.

But if you post again about how Phil from Duck Dynasty is being persecuted, I will cut you.

Sincerely,

The Bishop of the CTB

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