O’s vs. Nats: a forced rivalry?

There’s a lot to be said in this world about the whole “Baltimore versus DC” thing when it comes to most things in life: Cost of living (Baltimore is better), public transportation (DC is better), bars full of smug, douchey entitled assholes paying far too much for Rum and Diets (DC), crackheads (DC, their *mayor* was a crackhead, can’t compete with that), and so forth. And I guess there’s something of a rivalry between the Ravens and Redskins fans for some reason, but I can’t seem to figure out why unless the turncoat effect of Redskins-by-default fans in the absence of not having a football team here in Baltimore for ten years and then turning immediately back to the Ravens when Baltimore finally got a team back has some people bitter, but this particular video (see below) in which a fictitious pair of gentlemen – one a Nats fan, the other an O’s fan – saddle up to the bar at Hooters and engage in some witty back n’ forths feels a bit tacked on. It’s like “ok here’s another thing to throw onto the Baltimore vs. DC thing pile I guess.” I mean aside from some guy from the Washington Post being satirically butthurt about Orioles fans shouting out the “O!” during the national anthem do Baltimoreans really give a shit about the Nationals? I don’t, and while I cannot stand your run of the mil DC snob I certainly don’t have anything to say to a Nationals fan one way or the other.

It’s well established here in Baltimore that there are certain fans we cannot tolerate: Yankees, Red Sox, Steelers. Yankees fans are loudmouth assholes, Red Sox fans are fairweather loudmouth assholes, and Steelers fans are mouthbreathing loudmouth assholes. Well established. But a curious thing happened when recently the Phillies came to town with their fans in tow to populate Camden Yards — Orioles fans and Baltimoreans in general had to invent ways to trashtalk them, as if we’ve ever had issues with Phillies fans swarming our town and lousying up the joint. “They’re stupid!” “They’re greasy!” “They’re ….fat!” “They’re bad at doing their taxes!” I mean I guess the Phillies won the world series a few years ago and they’ve been #1 in the AL East every season since 2006, which is something Orioles fans should be envious of – as a team but the fans ain’t done nothing as far as I know.

But getting back to the Nats. Unless you’re using Baltimore vs. DC as a jumping point in general to spark this rivalry, I don’t get it. The Nats have been around for what, seven years and they came from Canada, we haven’t really had *time* to build a solid rivalry with the team or the fans. I guess there’s Davey Johnson and what not over there sparking a bit of something, we’ve always got the ancient memories of Cal and Eddie and Brooks et al to get misty about but do we — or they — have anything to brag about?

Eh, who cares, the video is pretty funny I guess.