Are you sitting alone, surfing the internets, with only the soft braying of goats to keep you company? Is the financial pressure of running a small farm too much for just one person? Finally, there’s an answer. FarmersOnly is the dating site only for farmers.

The applications process skillfully weeds out non-farmers by asking detailed questions about threshing machines (they thresh), tractor manufacturers (John Deere), and modern cow-milking techniques (think industrial breast pumps). Your match may not be educated, or attractive, or have all their teeth, but you can be sure they know how to farm. And isn’t that what’s important?

(Poor farmers, doomed to lose out to industrial farming companies, and now they’ve so skillfully set themselves up for ridicule. I’d almost think they did it to publicize their plight.)